This past Friday, as I sat reading an Emily Giffin novel in my minivan, another minivan pulled into the empty handicap spot next to me. The mom jumped out, pressed a button on her remote so that both doors slid open, popped an infant car seat out of its base, told a younger kids in the third row to "Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!"then pressed the button on the remote again to shut the doors as she scurried off to the front of the school. I noted that she didn't have a handicap parking placard or handicap license plates. She was a mom with a baby and a little kid who was running late to pick up her kindergartener so she decided that because all the other parking spots in the lot and all the illegal spots in the fire lane were taken that it would be okay for her to park in the only available spot, a handicap accessible spot.
I sat there and weighed my options:
- Call the police and
- hope that they arrive in time (doubtful)
- hope that they can find the parking spot (doubtful)
- Say something to the woman when she returns
- Do nothing
I ultimately decided to not police the ignorant this time. Although the last time, that woman was clearly asking for it. My kids will be in school with her kids for 11 more years and crazy people can live in the suburbs just as easily as anywhere else. I don't want to deal with them, although, I guess I am dealing with them, just not in the way I would want to. The fire lanes that are constantly blocked are the school's main concern. Grammy and I have actually both watched parents stop in the narrow parking lot (as in the part you drive through) and leave their cars there to go get their kids. They block the entire parking lot - no one can leave! It blows my mind.
There has been a police presence in the parking lot but he's mainly focused on those blocking the fire lane and he's mainly been patrolling in the morning. Plus, he covers all the school parking lots and there are quite a few of them. I have seen a decrease in those wrongfully parking in those handicap spots. There's a mom we know who was consistently late and parking there. Not anymore. I'm assuming she was ticketed, spoken to or came to realize that what she was doing was wrong.
Such a sad state of affairs. Where (or what) are their morals?
ETA: There are over 800 students in that one school.
20 comments:
Stories like yours make me realize the school system were I live has it right. See were I live you would be picking your daughters up at the curb. There is a well organized line you get into. The children riding buses get on and leave before that line moves an inch. They empty the schools here in 15-20 minutes. BTW, this is all under the watchful eye of the cops.
People just don't think the rules apply to them. My dad had a kidney transplant and the medicine made his legs really weak. He had a handicap card and people constantly berating him for being lazy.
Jen - that is terrible. It amazes me that in 2013 people don't realize that you can't always SEE a medical issue.
kdliberty - I would love a curbside pick-up! This school is so big though - I think it would take at least 30-45 minutes for curbside. And they just don't have the room for the cars. The school is on somewhat of a main street. I like how your school system operates.
I have always been very intentional about not parking in the handicapped spots, but I didn't even realize how unclear my thinking was until I met Megan, my friend of 12 years who has cystic fibrosis. She doesn't often need her handicapped sign, but when she is really not feeling well or it is winter (the change in temps from a warm car to freezing air makes her cough and really struggle to breathe) she uses it. I know people wonder why such a pretty, thin, agile 30 something year old woman parks in a handicapped spot. It has made me realize exactly how often I try to figure out just by looking at a person if they have an internal medical problem.
I feel like this is in part due to a huge disconnect between what schools expect (here at least walking within a mile) and what parents think is reasonable. Obviously Anna has a specific reason that makes walking longer distances challenging, especially after a long day at school, but why are all of these people picking up instead of having their kids walk? If the kids really cannot walk, why aren't they being bussed?
Not that someone should park in the handicap spot regardless, but it sounds like your school really needs to reassess how they get the kids out of school because it isn't reasonable to have to pick up a kindergartener and not have any place to park either.
Kim - for our school district, bussing is for kids who live 2+ miles from the school or it costs $$. This morning, with the wind chill, it felt like 1 degree outside - so no one was walking. There is parking across the street but apparently, people don't want to walk across the street. I've seen empty parking spots in our lot and people will drive by them so they can park as close as possible (in the fire lane). The lot is small (4 rows) so it most cases, it appears to be laziness to me.
Rereading the post about the incident last year (ugh) made me realize that your school doesn't have curbside pick-up. This is surprising to me, because every school in the district I grew up in (in FL) was designed for this. I can't imagine having to find parking somewhere.
And to the other poster who asked why all the "car" kids weren't walking - I don't know the setup of Sarah's school, but most of the suburban elementary schools I went to were located on dangerous busy streets, and the students zoned for the school came from all over. Only if you were lucky enough to live in a neighborhood adjacent to the school (without major highways to cross) were you lucky enough to walk. I don't know why all the kids weren't provided with bus routes, but that's just the way it was (we moved a lot, so I experienced bussing, walking, and car-riding in elementary school - I was no special snowflake).
Anon - I'll have to ask my SILs who lived here 20 years ago and had kids go through the school system what it was like back then. (If they had curbside) The town experienced unexpected growth 10-15 years ago and while they've done a great job with staffing, I think they suffered with logistics and the huge number of kids. The school is located on a busy street - I actually saw an older kids (4th-5th grade) almost get hit by a car a few weeks ago.
There is a app where you take a couple pictures with your phone of the car parked illegally in the spot and the handicap spot, and then the app sends it to your city, and they can ticket the people. Its called Parking Mobility.
http://www.parkingmobility.com/
Our school just built 2 new school that are pretty much identical for money reasons. They are both squeezed on small plots again for money reasons.(They were built at the same time.) They cheated and did something pretty cool. They both have a wide one lane road that loops around the back. The line to pick up your child starts at orange cones right before the small parking lot for the school. Both these schools have 400+ kids. We have state mandatory full day kindergarten here and Pre-k in all the schools. We paid big bucks to have someone help us with school safety. One of these days your school system is going to get and child killed unless they change their ways....
I don't know if it's fair to say that they are going to get a child killed. It's the parents' responsibility to get their kids to the doors of the school. People aren't driving like maniacs in the parking lot - they are just parking illegally because they don't want to walk. At release time, the kids are only released to certain people at the school entrance. At that point, it's the responsibility of the parents to get their kids safely back to their cars or walk home. There are crossing guards in the school zone.
To build new schools would cost $$$$ that the school system doesn't have, especially considering that the schools aren't that old and we've got old country roads and residential areas so space is limited. There are over 3,000 students in our school district.
We have about the same number of students here in my county's system. The 2 new schools that they built replaced 5 schools that were over 50 years old (1 or 2 were 70+). We actually have 4 PK-5, 1 PK-8, 1 6-8, and 1 9-12.The guy who helped with school safety was head of a huge school system. They use the same system we do because of way to many close calls. We did too before they changed it. Everyone is tired and it only takes 2 sec...
Not to sound rude or judgey, but I am not to judge people's morals lest we be judged. Who knows if she had a sick parent in the hospital, or her baby has colic, or something else we cannot see (much like people cannot see Anna's spina bifida.) Not justifying this woman's actions, especially if it is a pattern of behavior, but we don't know until we are in someone's shoes. Obviously this does not make them handicapped, but compassion goes a long way, as you have seen in your own life.
Nope - Sorry, Anon. Having a baby with colic or a sick parent in the hospital is no excuse for parking in a handicap spot.
I think anon was trying to say (or maybe not- obviously a colicky baby is no excuse to take a handicapped spot) was that this woman maybe had an emergency and was in a big rush to pick up her kids. Obviously it's wrong to park in a handicapped spot, but if she had an ill family member at the hospital or some other sort of emergency, it maybe made it justifiable in this situation to very briefly use the handicapped spot. What else was she supposed to do, wait potentially 10 minutes for someone else to pull out? If there was really an emergency, that would be a shame. If you did not have a handicapped kid, but if a family member got injured and was in the emergency room, you might be tempted to take that spot for a short amount of time.
Now, that's probably not the case, so I don't want to say it definitely is, but maybe giving her the benefit of the doubt would be nice. I'd be interested to know your take on this!
Just curious, but what do you think about non-handicapped people using the handicapped bathroom stalls if there's a long line?
Melissa - But then where do the free passes end? It's a pervasive problem and she fell into the stereotypical abuser - someone who shows up at the last minute. No one has to wait 10 minutes or even 5 minutes. They need to park on the street or across the street and walk.
Leah - I have mixed feelings on that. It happens. And it's not something you're going to be fined for.
It is not against the law to use a handicap accessible stall in a rest room. It IS against the law to park in a handicap space if you do not have the hang tag for your mirror or plates. How is this unclear?
Totally agree! Sometimes I think only those of us that have special needs kids get it fully.
Maybe you could arrange a meeting with the principle/Anna's IEP team at some point? It always sucks when you're the person bringing up these issues but I think it's something they should adress. I'm sure there are other kids at the school who also need these spaces and they should be available for them. It's a safety issue- parents and kids with mobility issues shouldn't have to worry about long distances and crowded parking lots.
Another idea could be parent council? Not about Anna /handicap spaces specifically but about the school's overall transportation strategy. It sounds like they need a new plan so people don't feel like they need to park illegally (i.e. in a handicap spot, the fire lane etc)
This situation sounds unpleasant, I think you handled it well though.
Post a Comment