Parenting x 3

Friday afternoon, I picked the girls up from school as usual.  On the ride home, they told me about their day and everything that had happened.  The difficulty level of their math tests, what they did in gym class, who was misbehaving, who said what.  When I say "everything" here, I mean everything.  We were almost home when Allie tells me that the teachers handed out a sheet regarding sign-ups for the upcoming parent-teacher conferences.  

I immediately went into spaz mode.  Parent-teacher conferences at the middle school are completely different from those at the elementary school.  First, they only happen once a year, and second, for most of the teams, there are not enough slots for parents.  This means that if your kid doesn't give you the sheet and/or you aren't signed up to receive the team emails and/or you just don't read the team emails, you could miss sign-ups and the teachers aren't all going to carve out time to meet with you at a different date. 

I do find it odd how each team at the middle school has a different method for signing up, but last year, I received an email stating that the link was active for online sign-ups.  It was similar to purchasing concert tickets.  Thankfully, I had been checking my email and caught it early.  The challenge for me is not only getting into the conference slots with all the teachers, but finding three back-to-back.  Space is limited on these and they are offered on a first come, first served basis.  Once they fill up, you are out of luck.

This year, the girls' team is offering parents, three options.  1.  One night, teachers will be available from 6:00 to 8:00 for five minute conferences, but there are no appointments.  You show up and wait in line.  There will be two teachers in one room, and three in another room.  You can meet with all the teachers, but the assumption is that you wait in two different lines.  I'm curious if the teachers really stick to that five minutes, because I know there are some parents who consistently go over the allotted time when it comes to conferences.  2.  You can schedule a ten minute conference (these will take place over the course of two afternoons) and meet with all five teachers at once.  These are limited and fill up.  You sign up for a specific time online.  3.  If you can't make it to any of the available conference times or don't feel that you need to meet with any of the teachers, the school can send you the teachers' notes that would have been discussed at the conference.

I had spent the morning at my parents' house, helping out my dad while my mom went to an OT/PT appointment for her hand.  I had stayed for lunch and left to drive directly to the school for pick-up.  I knew I had checked my email that morning but I couldn't remember when.  As soon as we arrived home, I jumped onto my laptop to check out the situation.  The team newsletter had been emailed and it had the same information as the notice the girls brought home but there was no mention of when we could schedule conferences.  I know from parents of older kids that sometimes the teams give a date and time.  

I tried the website, entered the girls' names, found the return email giving me a link to book and was able to schedule all three conferences, and I was the first one to do so!  Being a spaz pays off sometimes.  Not only did I need three back-to-back times, but I wanted to schedule early on in the afternoon (I ended up with the first ones) so that Rich wouldn't be stuck waiting if (when) they went over for the people in front of us.

So here's the thing - do Rich and I really need to meet with the teachers?  The middle school pushes growth and independence for the students and while parent's aren't cut out completely, it's definitely not the same as elementary school.  With everything Anna has to deal with given her spina bifida (leaving the class several times a time for nurse's office) and shunt (organizational, processing issues), we should be meeting with the teachers.  The kid is an honor roll student but that doesn't mean this conference won't be useful.  I'd like to follow up with teachers in person regarding aspects of Anna's 504 and to also remind them that it is stressful for her to miss a portion of class.

Allie's in a math class she originally wasn't supposed to be in.  There's a big, long story about scheduling and how she was one of the students on the border, blah, blah.  So she was moved up in a big way and I want to discuss this with her math teacher, who is my favorite by the way.  (She did get a 93 on their last math test!) 

Also, there's the fact that the girls want us to meet with their teachers.  They want to know that we are fully invested in their schooling, which they take seriously.  They want to know what their teachers think of them and if there is anything they should be doing differently.  Is it fair to only schedule a conference for one (or two kids) and tell the others, it's not necessary?  Life with three = keeping it fair.  

I recently read an interview with a blogger who has an elementary school aged child.  She commented how she's always confounded when she hears other parents say that parenting is difficult because parenting doesn't have to be difficult.  This isn't the first time I've heard this particular blogger make this statement and I can't tell if she's really clueless or means to be as condescending as she comes across.  Maybe she has an easy kid, but I would have much more respect for her if she said something along the lines of "My parenting journey thus far has been fairly easy."  Sister, you have one kid who doesn't have any medical issues or learning disabilities, and hasn't even hit the pre-teen years yet. Peace out.