Growing Pains

Not ever knowing if I would become a mom, it's been amazing to watch the girls grow and change.  But having three infants at once was so incredibly draining, quite often both physically and emotionally, that I sometimes feel like I missed out on the baby stage.  And then the toddler stage.  Now I have three pre-teens and it's really hitting me hard.

I often feel conflicted as a mother.  When you have a baby who will forever remain a baby, it's an absolute wonder to watch your children here with you become little people.  But in the pandemonium of triplet life, I used to imagine the day when all of us could sit quietly and read to ourselves, or eat out at a restaurant without that chaotic feeling.  And now that we have those days, a piece of me aches to hold those little babies again.  

I witnessed a shift in the girls this summer.  Their creative playing dropped significantly.  They asked to watch television more frequently.  (We still limit their screen time, especially TV where it's so easy to zone out.)  I heard, "I'm bored," over and over.  I've read that this is a thing for pre-teens.  I always have suggestions and most are met with pre-teen responses, including, "That's so boring."  I'm sure my brothers and I told our parents we were bored, and I'm quite sure we learned our lesson.  If you claimed boredom back in those days, you would be put to work.  You disappeared outside or in your room so you wouldn't be put to work.

I'm still allowed to do their hair (mostly for dance) here and there.  I want them to be independent but it's nice to be able to make outfit suggestions or braid their hair.  The girls are on the verge of never wearing bows and ribbons or homemade clothes ever again and I find that a bit frightening.  Maybe I'm afraid of them leaving.  I know that's years away but think about the teenage years.  Three teenagers.    

I've been thinking about what I used to be like when I was 10 years old.  I remember really getting into sewing and crafts around this age.  I also read all the time.  The girls take after me in the reading department but not yet with crafting.  I've tried to teach them a few things and they haven't really been interested, but we haven't quite touched sewing yet.  I used to sew clothes for my Barbies and Cabbage Patch Kid.  I think it was a way of being able to extend my time playing with them.

I know the world was a whole different place back in the '80s but I didn't care about where my clothes came from until I started 7th grade in a somewhat upscale town.  Then it was all Benetton, Esprit and Reebok.  My parents' response was no, no and no.  Those were some tough years.  I know some kids start with the brand name/store preference stuff early on these days.  It all depends on if they're being influenced by older siblings, parents or other kids.  So far, there has been none of that.  Aside from Converse sneakers, which are worn by everyone.  There are no stores they have to shop at or stores where they refuse to pick out clothes.  We'll see if that changes over the school year.

I was searching through my sewing area the other day and came across some fall ribbon.  We had just confirmed plans for apple picking with friends so I asked if anyone would want a fall themed hair ribbon.  The response was, "Okay, fine.  But don't even think about getting me a shirt with an apple embroidered on it.  I will not wear that."