Here and there, someone finds their way to my blog after reaching out for help after the diagnosis of spina bifida via ultrasound. I try to keep it real here and not portray some super idealistic (which would be unrealistic) life but that doesn't mean I write about every little detail, especially all of the struggles. When Rich and I were told that one of our triplets had a "birth defect" I didn't really know what to expect. That was followed with the words "spina bifida." At the time, we knew very little about SB but after hearing a quick description we both said, "It could be worse. It's going to be fine." And in fact, it could be a lot more difficult. We were also in a much different world after having lived through Abbey's death. I realize we've been extremely lucky with Anna's mobility and shunt. Well, was it luck or the talent of her surgeon? I don't know but there are days were I think, This could be really bad. We could be dealing with X or Y, which, my goodness, there are some parents out there living with the unimaginable right now. Count your blessings.
Anna's been going through a bit of a rough patch, which means we are all going through a bit of a rough patch. It doesn't feel right to list everything out but what we've seen over the years is a control issue. Think about it. There is so much of her life that is out of her control, especially the basic function of going to the bathroom, so she attempts to make up for it in different ways. We try to be patient. We let little things slide. But there are moments when Anna and I are both reduced to tears and I tell her that yes, I know it sucks but this is what we have to deal with right now. We need to make it work.
This kid is so amazing. Her laugh, her true laugh, is infectious. She has a way with little kids, easily befriending them. She can be so incredibly sweet, standing at the side of my bed in the morning, waking me with, "Hi, honey." She's a tough kid but I want to break down when I see her struggle. God, this isn't easy. (But we'll get there. We have to.)