Well, March has decided to show us whose boss this week. I pulled my Uggs and Michelin Man jacket back out of the closet yesterday morning after shivering through my Monday commute. Early fall is definitely my favorite season but summer is right up there too. I'll take hazy, hot and humid over freezing cold with sleet blowing in my face any day.
The forecast for last week had our warm temperatures ending on Thursday, which was a bummer considering that my day off was Friday. I had three almost back-to-back meetings on Thursday but when I did find some time to walk around the block, it wasn't as warm as I thought it was supposed to be. (Sometimes the ocean air cools off the area of Boston where I work.)
Friday ended up being a perfect day weather-wise. The air was warm and the sun felt so absolutely wonderful on my Vitamin D deprived skin. It wasn't hot at all and any trace of winter was gone. After lunch, I brought the girls outside to play in the yard.
OMG! THERE'S A BUG!
Acting while running.
And then the perfect day ended. I had the worst day I have ever had with Anna. She tested the waters at lunch by trying to eat animal crackers left over from school snack instead of her real lunch and then asking for dessert. Yeah, I don't think so. She eventually realized that she wasn't going to win and ate her lunch. There was no yelling or crying involved. Just her asking, me giving my answer and then eventually ignoring her requests for a cookie. This was not the issue.
She started off misbehaving outside by pulling Em's dress with her teeth and then taking Little Lion and not giving him back. She wouldn't listen to me and the situation reached a point where I was afraid that she was going to hurt herself or one of her sisters. After I took Lion from her to give back to Em, she started hitting me. That's when I picked her up and carried her into the house. She knew that I was as mad as hell but yet she continued to try to go outside all the while alternating between laughing and crying. Hysterically.
She eventually calmed down and was fine for awhile but then she started right back up around the time I needed to make dinner for them. This time, she insisted that she needed the book that Em was reading to her buddies. Seriously? We have 500 books in this house and you need that book? So she started pinching and biting Em. They know that we don't tolerate that type of behavior in our home.
She wouldn't stay on the couch for a time out and she knew that I was beyond pissed off. She even told me that she didn't like when I was mad. I don't know why that wasn't enough for her to just stop.
And then she was fine. It was like a switch was flipped and she was perfectly fine.
After we had both calmed down, I sat with her and told her about when she was born and how I had asked the nurse to bring her over to me in the operating room so that I could see her. She was wrapped up in a blanket and the nurse was holding her a certain way because of the boo boo on her back. And then I told her about how I would hold and rock her in the NICU and the nurses would tell me that she knew that I was her mommy because she was more relaxed. I cried and Anna buried her face into my lap.
For the love of God, I wish I could figure out what is going on with her. Rich says that maybe this is how she is dealing with stuff. With her frustrations and fears. If I take a step back from this child who is fighting against me, I see a brave little girl. But she's still afraid. She's a little kid who has to go through stuff that not all little kids go through. She's a little kid who asks if I'll hold her hand during her medical procedures. Why does life have to be so freaking difficult sometimes?
(I'm just scratching the surface here with this. There's so much more....)
To not end on a negative note, here are some more pictures from that day.
Allie's alone time reading to Elmo. I loved being able to open the front door and flood the house with light. How nice to not have to use my Speedlight.
We went for a walk down the street when Rich returned home.
I love this picture because Anna's laughing. I just want her to be happy.
Acting while eating.