Monday, February 6, 2012

The 'reason why I blog' post

When the girls were 13 months old, I hesitantly opened a Blogger account. My nervousness revolved around the fact that I was not very internet or computer savvy. I felt a bit out of touch and behind in technological developments.

I wanted a blog because I thought it would be an easy and fun way to update our family and friends with pictures of the girls and details of our adventures. In other words, the whole emailing thing wasn't working out. In addition, I had always wanted to write and so this blog would satisfy my selfish need. (I have since learned that there is a reason why I am a tax professional and not an author.)

The whole concept of blogging was new to me (yes, I must have been living under a rock) and the only blogs on my reading list were those of other triplet moms. I found those blogs to be helpful and entertaining and so I left my blog open for others to read. In addition, I knew that family and friends weren't going to visit my little nook of the www if there was a password involved. (As it turns out, some still require updates and pictures via email!)

Slowly, my little blog has grown and I'm so happy to have detailed accounts of the girls' earlier days. I sometimes read through old posts and can't believe how much I have forgotten. So much so that I wish I had started a blog when I was pregnant with Abbey.

Here's my view of the internet - it's an abyss of knowledge. It's also a form of entertainment but the knowledge share aspect is amazing. It most likely would have taken me much longer to develop into the photographer I am today if it had not been for the internet. Planning our Disney trips would have been much more difficult without message boards and blogs. Who knows if I would have ever found the book Sewing Clothes Kids Love and the pattern I used for the girls' Christmas dresses.

I know, I know. We survived the 70s and 80s without the internet.

I've met so many great and interesting women, moms and dads through blogging.

Unfortunately, the internet is full of rude people who feel that it is okay to hide behind a computer, make assumptions, judge others and hurt feelings. I can't even count the number of times I have seen rude commenters justify their actions by saying, "If you don't want to be judged, don't put your life out on the internet." Really? Where did that rule come from because I'm the one with the power to delete your rude ass comments. My blog, my rules. Should we all cower in our homes?

I try to make it a rule to only comment on the internet as I would in real life. For example, our neighbor's recycling bin was blown over a few weeks ago and our yard was littered with the packaging of many, many frozen dinners for kids. They have a four year old. Can you imagine if that mom posted to a message board or a blog that she feeds her kid frozen meals?

This doesn't mean that I agree with everything that everyone says. I'm guilty of rolling my eyes while reading certain blogs but I keep it to myself and move on. If I feel that someone is making misstatements with respect to spina bifida, stillbirth or a triplet pregnancy, I'll come out and say it just as I would if that person made those misstatements in real life.

Quite honestly, I've thought about closing shop many times. Most recently, a few weeks ago and again yesterday. I blog almost daily because I like the routine. I do need to be better about telling myself that it's okay to skip a day or two. Whenever I hit a low point, I always think about the wonderful comments and emails I've received or the women I've connected with who also have angel babies or children with spina bifida. That's what makes it worth it.

Okay, I don't want to start (or continue) babbling or sound like I am whining so I'll end this. I do want to add that Grammy was PISSED at those rude comments. She tried to leave a comment herself but couldn't log onto her account so I'll leave her comment here:

"Doesn't anyone think a grandmother can watch her grandkids because she WANTS to! Because she loves them so much, she doesn't want strangers watching them. Who would be the best person to watch little Anna -keeping an eye on her shunt/behavior."

60 comments:

Jayme said...

I love that your girls get so much time with their Grammy. I wish we lived close enough to my parents that my kids could know theirs.
If I had to pick anyone in the world to be with my kids while I worked (besides their father, of course) it would be their grandmother.

Lily said...

Sarah, I've read your blog since the adorable Elmo cake. Was that their 3rd birthday? I don't always get to comment because of time constraints, and since I'm usually reading from my phone, it takes twice as long for me to comment from there. But, I read every post, and every night around 9 o'clock I pop over here to see your pictures and read your words. It's been a routine for a long time, and I can't express how happy it makes me to see your daughters grow into beautiful young girls. I know it seems like no one's listening (i tried my hand at blogging for a bit, but I don't have quite enough motivation as you!), but I always am.

Jennifer said...

(((Hugs))) I check your blog daily. I think you are an amazing mom who loves her family. I think it is ridiculous for people to make rude comments.

Your girls are beautiful...thanks for sharing your lives with all of "us" out here in cyberspace.

Elizabeth said...

Your girls are adorable and you and your husband are doing a great job raising them! I think it's fabulous that your mom can and is willing to watch your girls during the day. Many people are not as fortunate! And I'm sure she hasn't thought twice about helping out! I"m sure the commenter the other night doesn't have triplets herself or a child with special needs and doesn't realize what all we have to think about or do every single day. You handled this with much better grace than I would have!

Farah said...

Don't even worry about the negative comment. You guys are doing an amazing job. You guys are very fortunate to have Grammy close by to take care of the girls. GO GRAMMY!!! Speaking of spina bifida, I work for a urological supply company in GA and I wrote a blog post (work related) on these two ADORABLE girls adopted from China who have spina bifida. I think you'd enjoy it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWmhS9PxHGE

Tina said...

I just skimmed through the comments a few posts back and in complete disbelief. Seriously, where do some people get off? You handled the negativity in a very appropriate manner... actually probably a lot more nicely than I would have.

I think you are doing absolutely everything right raising your girls. They seem so well rounded and happy, and they clearly adore you and your husband, and Grammy too of course! You obviously do what you need to do to provide a good life for them, and you do that so very well. Bravo to all of you!

Sandi said...

When my oldest was born, my mother volunteered to be our day care provider. We did pay her, but retiring from her retail job was something she did willingly to be able to spend so much time with her first grandchild. At the time, my grandparents lived with her and my father, so my son was able to get to know all four of these wonderful people much better than any of the other grandchildren have been able to. It meant so much to all of us for her to do this. They continue to have a very close relationship, and he will be 17 in April.

All of that to say, I know that Grammy has to cherish the time that she is able to spend with your girls. I cannot imagine why people feel that hiding behind the internet is acceptable when they would never say such things to people they know in real life.

Kimmy said...

Ever since I found out I was having twin girls, I scoured the internet for blogs of other MoMs. I have loved watching your girls grow and you inspired me to start my own blog while on hospital bedrest (for ten weeks!). I am so glad that I have all these memories of my girls from the start. They will be two in April!

Don't let the negative people get you down. You are doing a wonderful job raising those beautiful girls and that is all that matters. They are lucky to have such loving parents and their Grammy.

bearie1 said...

I'm a Grammy and I take care of my 3.5 month old grandson. I was never asked to. Some days are hard, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I feel bad as I get to experience things with my grandson that his parents should be experiencing. They both work, because they have to. I help out because I want to.

I love your blog! Elaine

tx folks said...

Please keep posting. I absolutely LOVE watching your girls grow. My father in law passed away at 94 years old, six months after his identical twin brother. I so wished for multiples, but 'it wasn't to be. We were only privileged to have one child.

Maybe you don't always identify the girls on purpose, but sometimes I SO wish I knew which was which in your pictures. BUT...it doesn't matter...I just love, love, love reading about them and seeing them. Also love the fact that their daddy is totally smitten w/them, as was/is my hubby w/our now 24 year old daughter!

So please continue blogging and laugh w/complete glee when you hit D.E.L.E.T.E. on rude people who have no business even reading your blog if they're going to make nasty comments.

Just the Tip said...

Sarah,
Those comments were completely out of line!
If someone doesn't understand how overwhelming it is to have a special needs child, they need to learn to keep their mouth shut.
I didn't know grammy stayed with you but obviously we've all read about your bedtime struggles with no mention of grammy, so you and Rich take care of it.

My GRANDMA watches the girls. I don't have parents, and Tj's family is out of state. If I didn't have her, I don't know what I would do. M can't go to daycare and I can't imagine anywhere would cath P as she's getting to where no one wants to change diapers.

You are a great mother, just because you work doesn't mean you are any less of a mother than a SAHM.

Hugs.

MandyE (Twin Trials and Triumphs) said...

I have seen some pretty incredible comments on blogs here and there, and of course on Facebook. It's amazing to me the type of person who must gain some kind of satisfaction for "telling someone off"...particularly cowering behind the anonymity of a computer screen.

I've only been on the receiving end of a very hurtful blog comment once, and it really bugged me. I shook it off after a couple of hours, but I'm trying to use it as a reminder to myself to reserve judgment...or at least keep said judgment in my head! :)

I, too, read your blog almost every day. I love how you document your girls' lives, and with such beautiful pictures. And I appreciate that you keep your content so "real". Parenting is hard work, and it's nice to be reminded we're not alone on this journey.

Michelle Vanderven said...

You GO GRAMMY!!!! Well said!! As for you Sarah, I read your blog diligently every day. I very RARELY comment. Could be because I am in awe of you. You are the perfect mum to your girls and really there is nothing I could fault in the things you do for your little family.

Grammy, your the best. WHY should anyone say anything against you. If my mum was around, she would LOVE to watch my kids. But we live on opposite sides of the world. Her in ontario, Canada and Ia m in West Australia!

... and PLEASE don't lock the blog!! What AM I going to read then!!

Kind regards,
Michelle
mjvanderven@gmail.com

Margaret said...

Hi Sarah, I commented on your post the other day, and I'm really sorry if it came across as rude. I didn't mean to sound that way at all... I've read your blog for a while now and like to hear your thoughts and struggles on the whole working mom thing, because that's what I do too and it is really hard. I was just surprised because from what you said about Grammy staying at night, it sounded like she lived with you. You guys are very lucky to have such a wonderful Grammy to watch your girls. :-) My mom would love to watch my kids, but she lives in another state. My MIL takes our kids one day a week, but she has to work too so she can't do more. By the way, since you mentioned that you don't get much time with the girls in the evenings, could you move their bedtimes back a bit? We have our daughter (just turned 3) go to bed at 8 (she wakes up around 7) just so we could have a little more family time in the evenings. I know sleep issues are a big thing for your girls, though... just a thought. I hope you keep writing- it's nice to know I'm not alone in feeling conflicted about working and having someone else watch my kids.

Kathy said...

Sarah,I'm a Grandmother (Nana to my Grandchildren)to three young children.I watch them four days a week along with my full-time job. I have several of my friends that make the comment that I should not be watching them as much as I do. I LOVE spending time with them and would not want them to be in Day Care. My oldest Grandson has very severe Food Allergies.I would not want anyone else to take care of him or his sister and brother. There is nothing more precious than a child, and I enjoy every minute with my little ones. I'm sure Grammy enjoys your little ones as much as I enjoy mine.

Maddison Snook said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vesti said...

I've been reading for almost two years, but never commented. Your girls are so blessed to have so many people who love them! My parents live almost 2 hours away, but my mom comments almost daily that she wished she could take care of our kids while we work. I do too! I can't speak from experience regarding triplets, but I do know the struggles of working full-time, with a husband who works full-time, a child with spina bifida, and a new baby only 20 months after the first one. We all do what we can to make it work, and shame on those with the nerve to openly judge (like you, I've been known to roll eyes. :-) ) Life is crazy and hard, but good. Thank you for allowing us to follow you and your family!

Lease said...

Sarah I hope that you continue to blog. Not having any girls it's fun to see how the other half lives.
I think you and Rich are doing an amazing job. It's wonderful that Grammy is available and enjoys spending time with your girls. As much as she enjoys it, your kids will get to grow up having an incredible bond with their grandmother.
Having involved grandparents is something not all kids have, I know at this point I'd be happy with my in-laws being able to tell my kids apart.
I'm sorry that the relative anonymity of the internet allows people to weigh in on subjects they have little or no knowledge of in such a negative or judgmental way.

lena said...

I love your blog and hope you keep it up. Hater's gonna hate!

caislas said...

Why not transform negative to positive?

In my humble opinion, if I am following correctly, the actual discussion might have been triggered somehow with Andrea's comment to one of your posts some days back. That specific comment triggered a lot of different feelings.

From my perspective, there is not right or wrong. The decision is complete personal on how to live each ones' life, and consequently how to raise each one children. However, I think the discussion unveils something more transcendental.

Working mothers in countries without support for them to raise their children have to face strong decisions constantly. The question is: based on what we will take those decisions? and each decision is complete personal and Sarah has showing us along her blog the decisions are not easy to be taken. In addition, the life of each one is unique surrounded by unique circumstances.

Does one's priority is to gather enough resources, to have one's kids going to college, to have trips, or to show them with an example about how to build a career outside home? or it is more important to gamble all that and be a mum staying at home helping one's kids to develop the critical milestones and habits which will affect them for the rest of their life. Perhaps we are trying to balance both way and it is not easy…… The decision on how to live one's life is personal, and depending HIGHLY on the personal circumstances of each one of us.

Yes, grandmothers can be there instead of a mum, and they can have all the love to help, but they will never be the chldren's mums, even if the have the same amount of love. There can be a lot of argument why, but the most simple fact is: there are two different persons. Btw, Sarah, tell to your mum to do not get upset, it makes absolutely no sense. When one gets angry it mainly affects oneself, so wonder why actually we get angry? Opinions are like belly-buttons each one has one, and it is up to us how to deal with opinions.

So, it is complete a personal decision how to raise our children and whatever is your decision, once time pass by, there is not way back. My best wish is that each mother takes the proper decision for herself according to her priorities and never regret her decisions. Hopefully, our societies can develop such that they can support working mothers.

Regarding your blog, Sarah, it is another personal decision. I enjoy it and learn from it, but it is up to you. What I found more interesting is your constant reflection about things. Sometimes I agree with you, others not, but that is the richness of life, be able to see the rainbow of colors.

All the best for your journey! :) and take it easy :) (actually, now I wonder if I haven't been one of the rude persons from the internet your refer to..... sorry if you feel like that from a previous comment I wrote... I know I can be hard sometimes, however it is not with the aim of harming, it is usually with the aim to be critical and try to understand things.... evolve is not a simple issue..... ).

JEN said...

People are jerks. I like reading about your children, love your photography, and adore their cute outfits. It is also good to read about the lives of other working moms.

Sarah said...

WOW! Thank you for all the comments of support.

Margaret - I honestly couldn't tell if your comment was snarky or not. Thank you for leaving a comment to clear that up.

There are many frustrations with blogging besides negative comments - not being accepted into certain mommy blogging circles (I must not be hip enough), the competition, posting cute pictures and receiving 1 comment while Mommy Blogger A receives 60 comments everyday.

I need to let stuff go and I am usually pretty good about it.

Oh, as for Grammy staying here for half the week. Her bedroom is far, far away from the other bedrooms. When the girls are up in the middle of the night, she doesn't hear any of it.

renee said...

My parent would love to stay home with my daughter but still have to work. They keep her one night a week because they want to depend time with her. My mother in law also watches my daughter one a day a week. My grandparents babysat me and I loved having that special time with them. Grammy and all her grandchildren with have special time together.
Readers also should remember that it is very expensive to live in the Boston area. It can be very, very difficult to survive on one salary.

Allison said...

People can be so rude...When I read about the girls' Grammy spending time with them, I thought about how lucky they are and she is to develop those relationships! I agree with you in that I don't know where people get the idea that leaving rude comments is OK....these are the same people who wouldn't dare make any comments in person, I'm sure. I enjoy your blog and am glad you aren't letting the jackasses of the internet world keep you from posting! Peace, Allison

Souza Sisters said...

I can't believe how insensitive people can be. I love your blog! I love hearing what your girls are doing and seeing their pictures! Yours is the first blog I read in the morning. You are an amazing mother! Why can't people live by the "if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all" rule??

Beth said...

I don't normally comment but I read every day and I want to say that Grammie is the best! It breaks my heart to drop my Emily off at day care and not have her home with some who loves her and is devoted to just her! And I think about how lucky your girls are so much more now that I am expecting twins (look for me on the bump MOM board :) ).
I am sorry that someone tried to ruin this for you, I wish you only the best!
Beth

Jennifer said...

I'm not sure what that woman was trying to accomplish with her post, but please disregard her. You guys are great parents, and your girls are so blessed to have their Grammy play such an important role in their lives.

Yes, it would be wonderful if you could be a SAHM. But it doesn't make you a better mom because you stay at home - just as it doesn't make you less of a mom because you work. Some men and woman have the opportunity to stay home with their children. And that's wonderful. Some moms and dads have the opportunity to stay home with their children, but chose not to because they are better parents when they go to work every day and get fulfillment from their job as well. And some parents don't have the option of staying home, even though they would dearly love it.

And I'm quite sure that if you asked any parent - SAHP or a working parent - there is never enough time. There will always be laundry that needs to get done, there will always be projects that get pushed to the way side. If we're wishing for things, can we put more hours into the day? I'm pretty sure that's the real solution!

Don't be hard on yourself, and don't let that mindless woman cause you (or Grammy!) any heartache. You are a beautiful family, and your love for your girls is evident every day.

Kelli said...

Sarah,

I have been reading your blog for quite sometime now and I hope you continue to blog. I know what you mean by being accepted into mommy blogging circles which is why I took a break from blogging for a while.

I think it is awesome that your children get to spend so much time with their Grammy!

kate c said...

I'm a working mother and I love reading about your life as a working mum! It makes me feel good to know there are others in the same boat as me. My husband works evenings which makes our childcare situation ideal for the kids (less ideal for us as a couple!). Did anyone ever think that by you working, you show your girls that women are just as capable as men? Everyone has to do what they have to do (or choose to do)...As for Grammy watching your kids...people are forgetting that your kids will be in school full time soon. It's not like they stay little forever. And its not that rare to have family members help out!

Rachel said...

Please don't stop blogging, I love following your blog and your girls. I think the commenter was extremely rude. I guess she is one of the lucky ones that won't have to work to help keep the family going. I know my parents would be more than willing to watch my two girls if I would ask them considering they moved to the town where we live so they could be closer, they take my oldest to school and pick her up everyday because I am unable to do it. Do I hate that I have to work yes, do I wish I could be the one to take them to school and bring them home yes, but I feel grateful that my parents are able to be there and help out. That commenter needs to get off her high horse and realize that working moms do the best they can, it isn't that their children are not loved or cared for it is that we are loving and caring for our children, we are giving them food and a home to stay in.

Genevieve said...

Sarah, your blog is a great source of humor and guidance, please keep at it! If you get less comments, it's because your audience is made up of so many busy multiple moms. Not that I can compare our family to yours, but my identical girls are about a year younger and cared for by my mom while I go out and try to be professional. It's nice to read about someone with some of the same struggles and joys. This is my first comment, and I can't promise to be good about more, but I admire all the amazing work you and your family do!

Great pics too!

Thanks and lots of good wishes!

Jess said...

I have never commented or even read the comments on your blog before so I was extremely shocked to see this post! Who the heck would leave negative comments to you? People who clearly have way too much time on their hands and need to get a hobby. I've loved reading about your adventures with the girls since I found your blog about 6 months ago. I'm expecting a girl in April and I think if you can do it with 3, I can do it with 1! You are clearly a very loving Mama and the girls are lucky to have such a wonderful Grammy so involved in their lives. Please continue to share your adorable daughters with us.

MeghanForbes said...

Please don't close your blog! I read it every day! Your kids are adorable, and I love reading about their antics! I also love that it has opened my eyes to the world of spina bifida and just how abled a child with it can be. Anna is an inspiration to all of us! And I love that your Mom watches them. I only have one child (and another on the way), and luckily my husband is home 2 days/week with her. But my parents are our main babysitters (we have never left her with a stranger) and we go to visit them all the time (they are a 5 minutes drive from us). Nothing wrong with families being close and supportive!

Caroline said...

Nothing to add other than 'Hear hear Grammy!!'

Julia said...

Sarah, I was so shocked by that comment that I replied to it and only later realized that my own comment sounded very judgmental, too. Of course I believe a grandmother, or whoever, can do what they like with their time or retirement, I just could not help pointing out to that commenter that I could not see why she must have expected other things from her retirement. IF she liked to travel or stay at home, fine, but watching the girls cannot be considered demeaning in any way!

And, as so may have already said, your blog shows so much great care and love for the girls, from you and everyone else you write about. Of course we can not know everything that weighs in your career or family decisions, much less judge them. I pray you can eventually find the balance you wish for!

Also, Andrea probably had no idea how horrible she sounded. Let's hope she read the responses and got the message. Of course much of that attitude will necessarily change once she has kids, in whatever number or situation, we know how inevitable that is :)

AlinaL said...

Hi Sarah,
I really really hope you don't close shop! I have come across your blog almost 2 years ago and have been reading it ever since - I feel like I know your girls. In fact, I'm totally not a serial blog-reader. There are only two blogs in the entire internet universe that I follow and yours is one of them - I love both your writing and your photos. Checking in with you is usually what I do with my morning cup of coffee.
As to lack of comments - frankly I never left comments because I didn't want to come across as a stalker :) (after all you, you don't know me, plus I don't have a blog on blogger). I was thinking of emailing you though to let you know that a random working mom of 2 in CT (who happens to be an accounting professor) is an avid follower. (you used to have an email address somewhere?).
And my mom laments the fact that she still has years until she can retire and watch her grandkids.
Please keep sharing!!!!!!

Erin said...

Hi Sarah,
I have been reading your blog for almost 2 years and I try to read every day. I don't always pay attention to the comments and after going back and reading them I can not believe that someone would post that. It is obvious that you are wonderful parents and do everything possible for your girls. Part of that is having to work outside the home at a job to help provide for them. I am a working mom with 2 little girls who are 18 months apart. I would love to stay at home but that is just not possible for us. Some people have that luxury but not everybody can and we should not be judged.

Also, it is Grammy's business what she does. We live on the East coast away from all of our family but I know my parents or in-laws would jump at the chance to watch our girls if possible and if there was a special circumstance (medical issue) they would go above and beyond to help with anything.

I just want to let you know that I love your blog and would be very sad if you closed down the blog. I am not a MoM but I can connect with you because we are both working moms with a lot on our plate...and we love to sew. Yours is the only blog that I have stuck with this long and I hope you know how much we all appreciate what you do!
Lots of love,
Erin

Danielle said...

New follower of your blog! I think it's amazing. I love your photos and all the funny stories you share! I am very excited to follow along!

And regarding the Grammy thing...I grew up far away from my grandparents and would have done anything to be able to spend that sort of quality time with them growing up. I think it's great that she is able and willing to be so involved in the girl's lives! Way to go Grammy!

Unknown said...

I'll add my comment to those who have been previously silent - I normally read on my phone and don't comment. I look forward to reading your blog as often as you post. I sometimes check out those other "hip" blogs, mostly as a window into a foreign species. But I connect with your blog the most because you have a down-to-earth perspective on real life as a working MoM, you share many of my interests (although you are much better than me), and most importantly, you are NOT sappy and overly obsessed with fashion. Thank you for that!

It is wonderful that your family is nearby to be so involved with your girls, especially with Anna's special needs. But if they weren't, you'd still find a way to make it work. We all do the best we can with what we've got to work with. And seriously, if someone is so judgmental of you (an internet stranger in a completely different situation) that it is affecting her own personal decisions, she's got bigger problems. Because daycare isn't "evil" - but that's a different soapbox.

One last thing, while I'm dumping everything into one comment - I loved the change when you got rid of your sidebar. Much easier for us phone readers to appreciate your beautiful photography!

Complicated said...

I don't know what the negative comments were, but I gather from other's comments they were about your mom watching the girls. I am also a full time working mother and my husband works full time. I was also lucky enough to have a mother willing to watch my two children until they were school aged. I can only speak for myself, but working outside of my home was never what I wanted, but what needed to happen to provide basic and semi comfortable living for my family. We DO NOT have a ton of money for extras but we don't starve either, we just make it by. It's a very personal decision and is never entered into easily. I 100% agree with you that it's on ones right to judge others, that's for higher powers to do. Keep your head up, you're a great mom who clearly loves and cares for her girls! And good for Grammy for getting mad, she's right too!

Complicated said...

WOW, I went back and read for myself. CLEARLY people who have no childen and absolutly NO basis for their opinion should keep their trap shut!! Sorry people are so completely RUDE!!

komurphy said...

Hi, I've been a reader (lurker?) since I got pregnant with twins over a year and a half ago. I just wanted to say I love your blog. My twins had a rough start and have special needs and reading your blog and seeing your great family gives me a lot of hope. ok, back to reading and lurking.

Hope's Mama said...

No matter what you blog about, I'll be here reading.
Long time supporter of you.
xo

Laura said...

I love reading your blog. I think all mothers face tough decisions whether they work or stay home with their child. You make sacrifices either way.

I'm pretty shocked by the rude comments--and that chick Andrea doesn't even have kids! Judegemental much? What on earth is just basing her opinion on? Apparently she has no idea how much work kids are. You are so blessed to have your mom help you out.

My mom is going to retire soon and help take care of my daughter so I can return to work part time. I've been home for a year and was so lucky to be, but I can't stay home forever and my mom can't wait to spend time with her grandchild. I feel so lucky to have family close by to help.

I would just ignore the rude comments or delete them as soon as you realize they are negative. No one is forcing them to read your blog. Sheesh!

Teresa said...

I also don't comment frequently, but have been a long time reader since probably just after you started your blog. I love reading about your girls. I especially love hearing updates on Anna's health (as a fellow shunt bearer). All your children are so beautiful and they are all such a blessing.

I'm not a mom yet, but my husband and I have discussed the reality of childcare when we do have children. Daycare is so expensive (can't imagine the cost x3) and it is wonderful that Grammy is able and willing to stay with your girls. It is amazing that she will be able to have such a close relationship with all of her grandchildren. I hope my future children will have as close a relationship with their grandparents. And as you said because of Anna's special needs, she can't have just anyone stay home with her. It is becoming more and more common for grandparents to be the "daycare" provider for grandkids. So you are not alone in that respect. You, Rich and Grammy, and all other family members that help care for your girls are doing a wonderful job raising happy and healthy children.

Lindsay Steele said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lindsay said...

I am also a "daily reader" of your blog, but like some of the other commenters said, I didn't want to come across as a stalker! I am not even a mom myself, but can't wait to be someday. Your girls are beautiful and I love how down to earth you are. I hope you continue blogging because there are many people who love to read your blog, myself included!

Wendy said...

Get fired up, Grammy! People can be so ignorant. The girls are lucky to have time with Grammy, and she's lucky to get to be with them.

Danielle said...

Wow. Sarah, I emailed you back and forward a few years back to tell you I was an avid reader of your blog. (Don't know if you remember!) I too have still read each and every day for as long as I remember! I too don't comment, as I know you are busy, and don't want to "annoy" you with comments, but please know, I still read each and every day! My Zarlee (my surviving identical triplet) is now four, has started kinder, is STILL diagnosed as failure to thrive (she is still not even 10kg.... Which is under 22 pound, I think?), and I love checking in with your girls, seeing what "could have been".
I too have gone back to work part time, and you are my inspiration; I always think "if you can do it full time, with three the same age, I can do it part time!
And yes, whilst you are extremely lucky to have Grammy help out, I am sure Grammy feels extremely lucky to be apart of your lives too! That's what family do, and you are all helping to raise wonderful girls, who I am sure when they are adults will help each other with their kid's. You are all wonderful role models to the girls, and they will grow up happy and well adjusted with so many adults loving, and caring for them!
The old saying " it takes a community to raise a child" is true! And you are all doing an amazing job! Keep up the good work!
Danielle, Gold Coast, Australia.

Jenn said...

I think it's great that the girls get to spend so much time with their grandmother. My mammaw used to watch me and my sister while my parents worked and did so for many many years. She passed away in 2005 and I love that I was able to spend so much time wtih her and have so many memories. My paternal grandparents lived out of state so I only saw them maybe once a year and I am not nearly as close to them as I am my maternal grandparents. Now that I have a daughter my mom watches her while I work. She doesn't do it because she has to, she does it because she WANTS to. When I started looking at daycares she was slightly offended that I was even considering it and immediately jumped on the opportunity to watch my little one. She recently had a week off because my husband was on vacation and all she talked about was how much she missed spending time with her grandbaby.

Ami said...

You are flippin awesome!! Way to go, Sarah!!

Matt & Shana said...

Sarah, I really enjoy reading your blog each morning! My husband and I don't have children yet, hopefully soon, but we both have intense careers like you are your husband and I enjoy reading your entrees about trying to find the balance. It's something I worry I will struggle with and you do great with it so it gives me hope!! I also really enjoy your camera tutorials as I'm a beginner who has recently gotten off of auto and gone to manual :)

Susan said...

I originally found your blog through HDYDI...love your photography and stories that are always an encouragement to me with twins just a little behind your girls in age. (I also have a daughter a little older). I suppose no-one can expect someone with no children to even begin to understand how intense life with multiples really is, and how moms have to do what moms have to do... I can tell you are a mom who really really cares, and thank goodness for the Grammys of the world!! Your story is always positive and encouraging to me-- THANK YOU!

Wiley said...

I haven't read all the comments and I'm coming into this very late, but I wanted to add a perspective that perhaps has been discussed less.

Your blogging has made a difference in my life and that of my family. Your honest discussion and sharing of Abbey's story was at the forefront of my mind when I was told that my daughter no longer had a heartbeat. My ability to process and deal was enhanced by having "known" you and in my case, this meant more time in-utero for her twin brother.

So thank you again.

And now with our upcoming surprise twins who are stubborn enough to defeat an IUD with our surviving twin from that pregnancy only being 18 months when they'll be born, your ability to handle and love everyone giving them time including occasionally yourself is an inspiration.

I will be working. It's really not a question. I'm an actuary and my income matters. And it's not really a field that you can walk away from a decade an walk back into. Also, I don't think I'd be a good full-time stay-at-home parent, but that's another issue. We are going to make things work as best we can. We are lucky enough to both have offices within a mile or so of the house and some ability to work remotely. But when it comes down to it, we do the best we can for our children and that is it.

Thank you again for you.

Ramatoa said...

I love the way you write about your adorable girls and the way you write about parenting. I love your photos (I'm a hobby photographer myself - though I prefer Canon ;-) )
So my hope is to still be able to check in here every night!
Thank you for sharing your honest thoughts!

Sarah said...

Danielle - I hope you see this. Of course I remember you! I was just thinking about you not that long ago. Zarlee is a fighter! Your comment almost made me cry - it is so good to hear from you.

Danielle said...

Yes, found your comment, thank you! Yes, my Zarlee is a fighter....fights with her sisters and brother constantly! What she lacks is size, she sure makes up with her feisty attitude!
Thinking you should forget your trip to Disneyland, and instead plan a trip to Australia! Beautiful, summer weather here at the moment....
Keep blogging. I don't know what I would do without my daily check in! I have done so for so many years now!
Thanks again for the comment!

Sadie said...

I've never understood rudeness...and I don't think I want to. Your blog is wonderful and no one has the right to judge...I think your family is awesome and wish I had a Grammy to watch my 8 month old daughter. Go Grammy!! Also, the girls' are too funny...thanks for cheering my days up with your posts....I appreciate it.

twinsplus3 said...

sarah i check your blog for new posts everyday and love hearing about the girls. you are a brilliant mummy and have a wonderful family.

Becky said...

I was first drawn to your blog because you were a baby loss mom and also had a baby with spina bifida. I have always loved reading about your sweet Abbey and also how Anna is doing with her bifida. Even though my son passed away I have a soft spot for kids with it and love hearing how well they are doing. I of course have fell in love with both Allie and Emily also and hearing all about life with triplets.

I haven't experienced any negative comments on my blog yet but don't know why some people just can't keep there mouths shut. I hope you continue to write because I love reading it all. And thanks again for the comment you left on my blog last week.