Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Blog, triplet mommy, fashion, style

Type these words into your favorite search engine and see what you get. For me, the results were ......errr interesting. What I did not find though was a blog written by a triplet mommy (one who works full or almost full time and has to dress a touch nicer than business casual would have been preferable) with fashion/style dedicated posts. Maybe I was using the wrong search engine.

Last year, there was a woman pregnant with triplets who was posting on my triplet message board. She told us that her house was spotless, her hair and nails were always done and she wouldn't be caught dead wearing anything other than a nice outfit, even if she wasn't leaving her house. She wanted to know how those of us who had already delivered our babies kept up with this.

Everyone laughed at her.

So she called everyone filthy slobs and another message board brouhaha ensued.

I wonder if she feels the same way now that her babies are here.

I should clarify that I merely witnessed the chain of events. Not only do I try to not involve myself in these things but I could remember what it was like pre-babies and how delusional I was. I did not realize how hard it would be until the babies were born. I am sure this is the case even if you having one baby.

I know it is this way even if you are having one baby.

When I was five months pregnant with Abbey, Rich and I babysat my niece, who was nine months old at the time. Her cold quickly became very nasty and I was covered in boogers, snot and baby food for most of the weekend. She had terrible coughing fits when she tried to sleep so Rich and I ended up sleeping in shifts so that we could hold her upright while she slept.

It was hard and there was only one baby.

Back to the point of this post. For most women, pregnancy wreaks havoc on your body. I had abdominal muscle separation from my pregnancy with Abbey. I didn't realize that it wasn't normal until my MFM pointed it out on my popped tummy with the girls. Apparently, it was quite a bit of separation for only having had a singleton.

I weighed 100 pounds and wore size 0 (or size 2) before I had babies. There was no way I was going to walk away unscathed after carrying the girls for 35 weeks and 6 days. Now, I'm just stating facts here. I know how very lucky I am to have carried the girls for that long and I would not want to change that for anything.

Currently, my weight fluctuates around what it was before I had babies. Sometimes it is a few pounds more. My shoe size is exactly the same. My pants size is now almost the same. I was able to pull quite a few pairs of work pants from storage and they still fit. Tops are problems. Apparently, my ribcage expanded and decided to stay that way. And then there's the awesome condition of my midsection.

Saturday morning, I tried to pull together a half decent outfit to wear. Nothing fancy. I just didn't want to look like a slob. I couldn't find anything. The fact that I needed to do laundry didn't help the situation. I should note here that I usually have about five minutes at most to "pull together" an outfit. I ended up wearing jeans and a pullover fleece that had a small crusty spot on the front.

Clothing has been extremely frustrating for me for the past four years. Not only do I not have time to shop, it seems like six months after I buy clothes, my body shifts yet again and I need a new size. I had to purchase all new work pants in a smaller size last spring. It was at this time that I was able to pull pants from storage to wear, which helped in the money department. Now some of those pants that I purchased are too big.

I really need to clean out my closet and bureau (yet again) and go shopping. I don't have time. And it is such a daunting process. I hate doing it.

I have skipped out on my awesome Stylin' (or not) Saturdays posts because, well, I would have needed to rename it Scary Saturdays. Plus, I didn't have any pictures.

Maybe someday my life will be more normal. Maybe I just need to take it one day at a time. It's going to be a slow process. But I will still refuse to wear heels while grocery shopping with my kids. Do people really do this?

Author's note: Okay, so I'm not loving this post. It's been in the works for more than a week now and I need to just hit publish and be done with it. I now have the beginnings of a cold and I want to go to bed.

14 comments:

Ami said...

Sarah, I actually LOVE this post! I'm pretty sure I also thought I'd be able to continue to pull off an extremely fashionable look after triplets, and that certainly I would be able to keep up the cleanliness of our house. OH MY GOD, I COULDN'T HAVE BEEN MORE WRONG. There are more of my clothes in piles on the floor than there are in my closet, mainly because it's all I can do to keep up with the trio's laundry. And yep, most of the clothes I grab to pull on come from straight off the floor and have any number of "spots" on them. Sigh...Anyhoo, just wanted you to know you are SO not alone!!

Hope's Mama said...

I loved this post, too. I hate that I never have time to pull an outfit together either. And everything is always a little bit crusty. Yes, even just with one baby.
Just on that, and I don't mean you here, but I often get frustrated when I read other twin or triplet blogs and they mention how we (who just have a singleton) don't know how good we've got it and that it is not hard at all. Sure, it must be a lot easier just having one and I can't for the life of me imagine what it is like to have two or three, but sometimes I just want to say, that all of it is a walk in the park compared to having a dead child. Parenting Angus is hard. It is hard. Period. But not getting to parent Hope is by far the hardest thing I have to do, or not do, in my life. I'm sure you feel the same way. Looking after the girls is a picnic compared to Abbey not being here. Just needed to offload that, as it often frustrates me and again I don't mean you here!
xo

Marcia (123 blog) said...

I also don't know how people go shopping in heels!

Why don't you hire a stylist? I actually came across one (a link from Centsational Girl's blog posted yesterday) who does virtual style things if you're not there - $5 a pop :)

Otherwise, I can thoroughly recommend Missussmartypants.com - I get no commission but I have used her and people always tell me when I dress how I'm supposed to for my frame that I've lost weight. These are, of course, instant friends for life because I could always use a little pick-me-up :)

Cindy said...

I just wrote a huge post and lost it. I can't write it again because I have to go try to get ready and look presentable for work. Basically, that is a joke, I never look as good as when I had just one child, my kids always look put together, I think it's about priorities (my coffee in the am is more important than my makeup)and I am jealous of the women that look great daily and don't get how they do it. Yeah, that sums it up.

Katlyn said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Katlyn said...

First of all I am so jealous that you are a Size 0 - I haven't seen the single digits in several decades! Ha ha! Love the honesty of this post! I have twins and I so get it! I work full time and never have enough time in the day and always put myself last. I need a stylist - ha!

soulsingingliv said...

I absolutely loved this post. I just had baby #2 four months ago and I went back to work when she was 8 weeks old. Working three 12 hour shifts a week, caring for an infant the other 4 days a week, carting my 6 year old around town for all her activities, etc. It really leaves no time for fashion anymore. Most days I live in jeans and whatever top I can fit over my boobs I am still not used to (thank you breastfeeding). It is what it is and we eventually find our way. I remember not feeling like myself after my first baby until she was about two years old. I guess when you add yet another that time span just lengthens. I think you are beautiful and your children are precious! You're not alone in these feelings!!

Sarah said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one struggling with this. My triplets were born 8 weeks ago and I just started back to work. Not only is my body a completely different shape, I've lost 30 pounds from pre-pregnancy. I took me 20 min and ump-teen pant/top combinations to find something presentable for work this morning.

Christi said...

I struggle with looking cute and pulled together too. And I don't have kids! I just don't like going shopping. I'm tired of my winter wardrobe which has been cobbled together for the last 2 years when I moved to work environments that were more business then the casual companies I worked for the previous 8 years! I really need help with the accessories. A cute necklace makes a lot of difference in an outfit!

Cassidy and Kevin said...

I've never commented before, but I love your blog, and your pictures actually inspired me to taking better pictures myself. I only have a singleton, but I got really sick after I had her and ballooned to about 250lbs (125 normally) in water weight, which left my body with some less than desirable traits. If you have a few minutes you can check out polyvore.com, you can put outfits together in any price range you want, AND they have featured outfits you can get ideas from. And on a side note, the pics you did post of yourself you looked perfectly put together, so you shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

Cassie said...

I can't remember the last time I wore makeup, Im long overdue for a haircut, and I wear the same clothes over and over again... None of which are nice...most have bleach stains somewhere on them.. I am a SAHM to 3.5 yr old triplets... Never had a nanny and have only left them with a babysitter a handful of times... Last time must have been 1.5 yrs ago, for a Dr.s appt (for myself)... I was quite delusional about motherhood beforehand too... I thought I would be able to continue my weekly pedicures and eyebow waxes... I think I have done both maybe 2-3 times since they were born... Instead we have weekly trips to Chuck E Cheese and the bounce house.....

Sarah said...

I only had twins, but had the ab separation thing. Just recently took a class and wow! I can totally see new results. http://www.maternalfitness.com/ is the site. the seated tuplar method does wonders for the moms whose bodies just never get completely back to normal.

Elly Rarg said...

Love the honesty of this post, hey. I don't have kids, but with reading blogs like yours I'm hoping to be a little bit less delusional when I do. So thanks, hey. Also? I don't know anyone that wears heels when grocery shopping - why would you do that?!

Jade said...

If you ever feel crappy about what you're wearing at least you know you have three of the cutest accessories!