Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Three in K

During recent conversations with moms at gymnastics and from school, I've been asked if it is crazy having three kids in the same grade.  I usually nod.  I sometimes think it is but how can I really judge when I've always only had three the same age.  I don't know any different.


The school thing can be tricky but would it be any less difficult if they were in three separate grades?  I'm imaging that three different drop off and pick up times or two of the same time but at different locations would be taxing compared to what we have now.  Now it's simple.  With the girls older, I sometimes think that having three the same age is easier.

What I'm struggling with right now is the fact that, as a family, our routine has been a bit up in the air.  Rich is at home but he's studying for the CPA exam so he's not really "at home" full time.  Grammy has been coming over a few days a week to watch the girls so Rich can spend time at the library studying.  While the girls usually do not have homework, they do bring home a slew of papers each week, some of which should be completed at home but not returned to school.  When you have three different adults handling paperwork, it needs to be very organized and right now, to me, it's not.  We need a better system.  While not that big of a deal right, it will be in the coming years when the girls have more homework.

Friday, the girls brought home notices regarding scheduling parent/teacher conferences.  We were given the choice between two dates and either morning or afternoon and the notices were supposed to be returned yesterday or today.  There are always those "we can't please everyone" and "first come, first serve" lines that make me nervous considering that we need to meet with three different teachers, two reading specialists, Anna's OT and PT and Anna's IEP coordinator, who is also her reading specialist (so that should help.)  I had the sheets filled out and ready to go the other night but I didn't place them in the girls' folders because sometimes they like to pull things out of their backpacks so it's best to place important items in there as we are packing up their snacks.  I screwed up because in my mind, I thought Rich was bringing the girls to school and I was going to remind him to include the notices in the folders.  I forgot to say anything yesterday morning and Rich went off to library while Grammy brought the girls to school and now I'm overreacting and assuming that we won't receive the dates/times we requested, which will mean more moving schedules around.  (I know.  It's the end of the world!)

Honestly, if I think about the future, I can't imagine myself and Rich both working jobs that require overtime in Boston.  I know that other families have this arrangement and they survive but what about their sanity?  I don't know about you but I can't remember anything anymore unless it's written on a list.  And I don't lose the list.  I can't remember what I wore to work last week unless I haven't done my laundry and it's in the hamper. 

We've talked about placing the girls in the same classroom at some point, when socializing is less of a focus.  Rich suggesting doing so next year for first grade and I'm leaning in that direction as well.  It will be interesting to hear what their teachers think and to see how the remainder of the school year goes.



Tracey's Life said...

Hi Sarah, its crazy when you have two in two different schools, (because of ages) and it is always a good kind of crazy with kids anyway. I actually found that mine need me more in High School because of all the school activities, but I wouldn't change a thing.

I noticed you dropped from #1 spot on Baby Blogs, would you mind reminding us to vote for you every now and again. I like seeing you in the #1 spot.

Have a nice day :)

Jilly said...

I remember when I was growing up, conventional wisdom was to keep siblings in separate classrooms. UNTIL my school district decided to experiment with year-round school. To save space, there were five different schedules, so that at any time there was one class that was on break (and then there was a class that moved into whatever classroom was vacant). Since we were dealing with different school calendars, not just different classrooms, that meant all siblings had to be on the same schedule - and any twins/multiples were in the same class. Even then I wondered how that worked out them.

Anonymous said...

those backpacks look massive on your girls! haha!!


Ellis said...

As a former K teacher (I teach 2nd now), I wanted to let you know that I always worked with my parents who I knew had more difficult schedules when it came to conferences. If I had a twin in my class, I would work with the other teacher to schedule the conferences back to back. Hopefully, your girls' teachers will do that too!

Lily said...

Cute sneakers!

Stacey L. said...

I have 4 kids in three different schools and I work full time, so the morning is crazy. Luckily we live fairly close to both schools so my middle schooler and high schooler either walk or ride their bikes. I drop of the twins in pre-k, then have 20 min to get to work at a school. It's crazy no matter how many kids you have in the same grade or different grades or schools.

And I thought I was the only one who only remembered things if they were written down...nice to know I'm not.

Ami said...

Hey Sarah,

I LOVE reading your posts about kindergarten and your perspectives on how everything is 'run'. My triplets will be in kindergarten in one more year.

Now, the flip side, is that I myself am a kindergarten teacher (and will probably have to have one of my kids IN my class! aaahh!) . I'll just say that I would certainly HOPE your girls' teachers would coordinate for you. That seems to be the 'thing to do.'

Also, I agree. I think as triplets get older, it will be easier than having 3 kids in different grades. As for the keeping them in the same class, our principal doesn't allow it, but I'll be very curious to see how you like it, if you go through with it. I'm SURE it would be easier...all their HW would be the same...same times for class plays and performances, etc. I say give it a whirl as long as the socializing thing isn't an issue.

Best of luck all around! :)


Courtney said...

I LOVE how their backpacks are half their size. They are such peanuts.
I have a question about multiples (sort of) - the girls we are adopting are three months apart in age and we just found out they wear the same size clothing and shoes (we had previously been told one was much smaller). They will be sharing a room and therefore a closet. Do you face issues with "my clothes, your clothes?" We have been buying whatever we can on sale and at outlets, but I'm curious if we'll have WWIII if one wants to wear a certain thing at the same time as the other. Of course, we have a different situation in that these kids have never had anything of their own before, which can add another level to things. Just curious what your experience is. Thanks!

ByKirsti said...

I know exactly what you mean! At one point i almost thought i was going senil!

Feel free to join my international hello kitty giveaway

pyjammy pam said...

Having three in different classes is tricky right now. But I can't imagine it'd be any less tricky if they were different ages. The hardest part for me is when they have teachers meet with parents all at the same time. I need to clone myself.

I've also thought about putting them back together one day. It sure would be easier....

Sarah said...

Tracey - I try not to think about high school. So, so busy! And I agree - 2 in 2 different schools would be tough. I'm sure there are conflicts.

If I drop more on TTB, I will post a reminder. I don't mind being #2 - although #1 is nice. Thank you for voting!!

In Massachusetts, parents can decide whether to keep multiples in the same classroom or separate. There are identical twin boys in Allie's class.

So far, I rec'd the appt for Allie's conference and it's on the day I can't do :( unless all the others are scheduled on that day.

Courtney - congrats on your adoption! My girls now have their own closets and clothes - there isn't any fighting. When they did share a closet, there wasn't much fighting either b/c that's what they were used to. I also used to buy a lot of 3 of the same thing.

Mamma Sol said...

First, I want to say that I think you are doing amazingly well. This year is the first year I have been able to work full time because of my health (which took a turn south because of twin pregnancy issues), and I kind of have to because we need the money to buy a house (the apartment we have is cheaper but is becoming more cramped as the girls grow and their activity levels - somehow - continues to increase).
I am in awe that you are able to pull it off, with the commute, and not-just-two-but-tree girls/classrooms, and the after-school-activities.
In my family, only my husband has a commute (and it is only 35 minutes on most days) - me and the kids are able to walk. We are signing up for our very first activity now (aged 4 years, 8 months) and while we don't have to, I really want this to work. It is a swimming class, they need to learn for safety reasons, and they need to get some physical exercise (to reduce the amount of time our cramped living room needs to stand in for an obstacle course) but I already dread the hustle and bustle required to get us all home in the afternoons, the change of clothes, the super-quick dinner, the "driving there and will we make it and the please can you get into this swimming suit because we were due in the pool 5 minutes ago"-stress which, hopefully, will be forgiven since it is family time and together time and we learn something new and we are not stuck in front of screens for this one hour out of the day that I hope it will be.
I know you have a helpful Grammy. So do we. But you are still amazing. Know that!

Mamma Sol said...

I sort of forgot what I was going to say, so I leave yet another comment here (sorry!). But here it is: Our girls are in different rooms now, as per our choice (and some convincing and meetings to get it through). It is hard but important since they are identical and rely heavily on each other. However, in august -14, they "graduate kindergarten" (the Norwegian system is different, but kind of) and will start elementary school. The way things are now, if I get the choice of having separate classes or not - I wil definitely ask to have them in the SAME class. Two years of separate-ness is enough (I think) for them to learn to rely on themselves, and the elementarry school is ridiculously large and confusing. So, to have that extra bit of feeling safe because your sister is there, I think will be good for them when learning is becoming more academic and less social.
I think the same MAY apply to your triplets - they will have learned much from having been separated, and have gained a lot of confidence in social situations - so you no longer _need_ to keep them apart from 1st grade.